Punishing our Children

This hurts me more than it hurts you.

Remember when our parents used to say that to us? You don't ever really believe or understand it till you're a parent yourself and your children inevitably make you punish them.

My 8 year old has a special notebook that she's supposed to bring home every single day. This notebook keeps me and her teach in constant contact with each other to help my daughter with some of her problems she's having in school. There's been a handful of days here and there that she hasn't brought the notebook home and she's basically just gotten 'the look', reminded that it must come home every day and mention that if she continues not to bring it home we might have to find a suitable punishment for the crime. But this past week has been horrible.

Monday - No notebook...just 'the look', a reminder and a nice little mention that a punishment may be in order if she continues to not bring the notebook home.

Tuesday - No notebook...I've come to realize that the 'mention of punishment' is no longer being taken seriously and its time to put it into action. So, once the home work was finnished she was made to clean her entire bedroom. (A task that is usually left for the weekends but, she had little homework because it was in the notebook.)

Wednesday - No notebook...Okay, I thought for sure implementing a punishment was definitely going to handle the problem. Obviously not. So, this time I made her do some extra chores around the house and I made up my own homework for her. I'm sure she would have much rathered do the homework that was located in her notebook from her teacher. This should definitely be a good reminder to bring the notebook home the next day.

Thursday - No notebook...Ugh! I am now at my very wits end! I've run out of chores that she'd be able to do in a reasonable amount of time (because we don't have that much 'extra' time in the evenings). Now it's time to take away a priviledge. Thursday evenings she's usually allowed to stay up later and watch Survivor with her father and I. I decided that tonight she wasn't allowed to stay up. I was even so angry with her that I also made mention that if she didn't bring the notebook home on Friday she wasn't going to be able to go Trick-Or-Treating this weekend. (Don't speak when you're angry! Think before you speak!)

So here's when "This hurts me more than it hurts you." comes into action. First of all, I enjoy our "Survivor time" together. It's just her, me and her father spending time together watching tv. Her little brother isn't allowed to stay up and watch (mainly cause he won't stay quiet long enough, LOL!) So, I tend to enjoy this time with just her.

AND...I really, really, really must say that I hope like crazy she brings that notebook home tonight! The last thing I want to do is take away Trick-Or-Treating. This is something we all enjoy because the kids have fun dressing up (of course the added benefit of the candy!) and we enjoy visiting friends and family. This is only a 'one-time-a-year event' and I don't want to have to take it away.

Of course I have my husband breathing down my neck all the time about 'threatening' and not following through. And of course, he's right too. If I keep telling them I'm gonna do something and don't follow through, they'll never take me seriously.

Well, let's just cross our fingers (really hard) that the notebook comes home tonight. If not, I don't know what I'll do.